insaine gym
Come with me to tour the hottest new gym in town!
This is Gateway Fitness. It just opened up on Leary, and I couldn’t be more excited.
They invited me to an exclusive session for local gymfluencers. Hey girl!
First thing I noticed was the view. It’s practically 360 views of the city up here.
We did a sunset session, and the light hit just right.
The custom Gateway earbuds were so cute, and they fit perfectly in my ears.
My personal trainer — Shoutout Wayto! — talked me through the best exercises based on my hormone levels, calorie intake, sleep score, and other health metrics from my Aura ring.
The workout was tuned exactly to my body. I definitely felt stronger after, but I wasn’t completely dead.
On the way out, I grabbed a calibrated protein shake, and called it a day. Can’t wait to go back!
Caption: Follow me on the Gateway Fitness app - link in bio - and meet your trainer for 15% off with code JADE28 💪😅
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That’s as good as it’s going to get. She approved the edited cut for Jade, and practically threw her phone across her bed. She’d hated that Gateway gym. So culty.
Well, the sauna was nice, even though that didn’t make the final cut. Jade didn’t think it set the right tone for her followers. And she did love the protein shake. Jade doesn’t put anything that isn’t pre-approved into her body. Even if Gateway claims to “calibrate” the shake to her exact replenishment needs. Whatever that means. At least she got to drink it instead. If Jade had asked, she would’ve told her that it was just a strawberry-banana peanut butter smoothie.
She was only surprised that Jade actually liked the workout. It was so eerily quiet in there. Jade probably didn't notice with the earbuds in, but it reminded her of when people were trying to make silent discos a thing. No amount of influencing could convince her those were fun.
Tonight there were at least ten other influencers in Gateway’s studio. All of them moved silently, listening to their Wayto’s. Jade’s station automatically rotated equipment with each set. The weights rose right out of the floor. Jade squealed the first time she saw the switch. That’s how they kept the studio so clean and photo-ready; everything’s stored below the floor. Jade wanted to include that part in the script, but it was too hard to explain without wasting seconds. Time is money and whatnot, she had to remind her.
On the way out, they learned that Jade could’ve customized her Wayto to look like any celebrity. She insisted they go back to work out to Travis Kelce — before he went bald, she said. She reminded Jade that they couldn’t post that on her channel without the rights to his likeness, but she knew that Jade would make her chase those down eventually.
She grabbed her phone again, and texted her sister to reminisce about the days when going to the gym was her daily dose of socializing. She’d always go to Lindsey’s pilates class on Wednesdays. There was somewhat of a regular crowd, fellow masochists. Lindsey could really burn your glutes to oblivion.
It’s not like she talked to anyone, even if she recognized them. Just polite smiles and the occasional commiserating. Maybe tossing Lindsey a “Thanks for class!” on her way out. But still. They shared the hype music, and Lindsey’s slightly cheesy pep talks. She would slyly watch everyone’s form in the mirror to make sure she was doing it right. Usually ended up admiring her outfit, or eyeing the one boyfriend who got dragged to class. There was a certain camaraderie.
At Gateway, Wayto just holograms in front of you when you need a demo, and otherwise you’re in your own world. Jade loved it, even though she hates being alone. That was the weird part. “I just feel like I’m finally going to know exactly what my body needs,” she said. “Like I can finally feel what namaste means, ya know?”
There were so many things wrong with that sentence, but she knew what Jade meant.